NDA Art Critique Message Boards

View, Share, and Critique Art!
It is currently May 20th, 2013, 8:02 pm

All times are UTC - 5 hours




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 64 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ... 7  Next

First Villain
A) A humorous villion (e.g. Joker, Green Goblin) 17%  17%  [ 5 ]
B) A rich, resourceful guy (e.g. Kingpin, Lex Luthor) 31%  31%  [ 9 ]
C) A knowledge hungry dood (e.g. The Leader, Brainiac) 3%  3%  [ 1 ]
D) A big, brawny idiot (e.g. Rhino, Bizzaro) 10%  10%  [ 3 ]
E) A man-beast (e.g. Lizard, Carnage) 14%  14%  [ 4 ]
F) A seductive super hottie (e.g. CatWoman, Black Cat) 24%  24%  [ 7 ]
Total votes : 29
Author Message
 Post subject: Re: Lifestyle of a Teenage Superhero(Part 3)
PostPosted: March 22nd, 2009, 8:55 pm 
Offline
Paladin of the Night
User avatar

Joined: March 13th, 2009, 12:15 pm
Posts: 562
Location: Umm.... Where am I? How'd I get here?
PART 4!!!!!!


Quote:
I stared at my hand for a long time. Soul just sat back and sipped his tea. After nearly five minutes, I spoke.
“H-how… W-what did…Huh?” I said, panicking. I began moving my arm around. It moved just as a normal arm would. “What did you do to me?!?”
“What I did was save your life. You could show some gratitude.” Soul put down his cup on his table and leaned forward.
“You turned me into a robot-armed freak!” I looked at the limb again.
“Well, actually… I turned you into a robot-bodied freak.”
“Robot-bodied…! What?!? My whole body is like this?!?” I tried to bend my neck down to look, but the metal restraints got in the way.
Soul just smiled and turned to the computer monitor. “Why don’t you find out? You broke your arm free, why not the rest too?”
I grabbed the bar on my other arm and pulled as hard as I could. Amazingly, the bar snapped right off.
“You see, good things do come from robotic limbs. Enhanced strength, for example.” Soul watched the monitor intently. I raised my right arm to see that it too was robotic. I began breaking the other restraints and jumped to the ground to examine my new body.
My hands were a light gray color and my fingers were blocky and rectangular. My arms were blue-gray from the base of the hand to the elbow, and from there to the shoulder, was light gray again. My upper torso was large and box-like, much like a small TV. It too was blue-gray. My stomach area was skinnier than my upper torso, cylinder shaped, and light gray. My pelvis was the same color as the upper torso, and was shaped like half of a hexagon. As for my legs, they followed the same pattern as my arms, but my feet were shoe-like; they had no toes. Instead, they were rounded at the end and had treads on the bottom.
I stood there, once again in shock by my appearance. Soul typed something into his computer and took another slurp of tea. I shook my head and sighed.
“Do you have a mirror?” I asked. Soul nodded and walked deeper into the warehouse. I took a minute to look at my surroundings. There were many scraped vehicles and other machines. The warehouse itself looked about the size of Wal-Mart from end to end. I looked at my hands and sighed. “Why me?” I asked myself. “What did I do to deserve this?”
Minutes later, Soul returned with a hand mirror. “Thanks.” I said as I took it. I looked at the mirror and gasped at the reflection.
My hair used to be short and blond, but now it was longer, thicker, and black in color. My ears were nothing more than tiny satellite dishes with short black antennas on top. In place of my eyes were yellow-green lenses in the shape of my old sunglasses that nearly seemed to glow. They didn’t hook to my ears; instead they were invisibly attached to my face, which, unlike the rest of my body, had skin.
I sighed again. “Alright. Now, will you answer my questions?”
Soul nodded. “Ask away.”
“What…What happened to my dad?”
“Died in the explosions,” He said. I winced and rubbed my hand through my hair, holding in my emotion like I always seemed to do. I took a minute before asking my next question.
“How long ago was the accident?”
“Nearly a month ago.”
“Why did you save me?”
“Truthfully, you are a test subject. I needed someone to use my robotics on.” Soul grinned and shrugged.
I thought about my next question before asking. “What… What can I do with this new body?”
Soul chucked. “You are about to find out. It’s time for your training to begin.”
Lots of long detail :sick:

_________________
ZebrA CloaK.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Lifestyle of a Teenage Superhero(Part 4)
PostPosted: March 23rd, 2009, 10:34 pm 
Offline
Ancient Dragon
User avatar

Joined: March 11th, 2009, 7:06 pm
Posts: 425
Location: Somewhere. Plotting
Very Cool Character! needs some adjustments but otherwise very good

Also fix this "Hi looked to me to be about 45 years old" He looked.....:amused: :weird:


DrawingDragon I know how you feel

_________________
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Lifestyle of a Teenage Superhero(Part 4)
PostPosted: March 26th, 2009, 4:41 pm 
Offline
Paladin of the Night
User avatar

Joined: March 13th, 2009, 12:15 pm
Posts: 562
Location: Umm.... Where am I? How'd I get here?
Oh, thanks. :j

_________________
ZebrA CloaK.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Lifestyle of a Teenage Superhero(Part 4)
PostPosted: March 27th, 2009, 6:50 pm 
Offline
Paladin of the Night
User avatar

Joined: March 13th, 2009, 12:15 pm
Posts: 562
Location: Umm.... Where am I? How'd I get here?
Well, This is an exploding topic :sarcastic: .

Part 5:


Quote:
I spent the next week listening to and learning from Soul. I couldn’t believe all the things I could do! My strength alone was incredible! I could lift a car over my head, break through a concrete wall, and even jump to the ceiling of the warehouse!

Besides strength, I had tons of little gadgets built in too. For example, the tip of my index finger could unfold and reveal a working power drill. My personal favorites, though, were small missile launchers that came from compartments on the tops of my wrists.

My senses were better than ever now as well. My dish-shaped ears allowed me to hear much more acutely and even receive wireless internet, cell phone, and radio signals. My sight had improved too. Unfortunately, I had entirely lost my sense of smell.

As for my sense of touch, Soul told me that microscopic wires lined all of my metal skin, plus the artificial skin on my face, which allowed me to feel. I was also happy to learn that I could still taste and eat.

“You have a tank inside you… an artificial stomach that compresses the food,” Soul explained. “It needs to be emptied every two months, the same amount of time as your maintenance requirements. As for tasting, it was a tricky job for me to do. I had to mechanically and digitally reconstruct a human tongue. I felt satisfied with the final product, but keep in mind that foods may not taste exactly as you remember them.”

I controlled all these abilities with my mind. Apparently, part of my brain was damaged in the accident, so Soul actually performed brain surgery on me and replaced a fourth of it with a computerized one! Like I said before, I could pick up wireless internet, so I could actually surf the web inside my head. Another useful ability was Bluetooth capability that I could use with any cell phone.

After Soul finished teaching me, he had me practice in a gym area of the warehouse while he went off working on some invention or experiment. I still hadn’t fully gotten used to my new body, so I had to practice. I bench-pressed cars, performed back flips, and did a few other tasks. One of these tasks was carrying an egg across the room. The first few times I tried, the eggs shattered, but I got the hang of it eventually.

When I wasn’t training, I had a lot of time to think. My thought usually turned to my old, unhappy life, and I kept debating whether this new one would be any better. How would people react to a robot-kid walking the streets of Technetium City? Would they stop and take photos or run in fear? I planned to find out.



Looks shorter due to lak of dialogue

Comments? :thinking:

_________________
ZebrA CloaK.


Last edited by ZmanArt007 on March 28th, 2009, 7:33 am, edited 1 time in total.

Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Lifestyle of a Teenage Superhero(Part 4)
PostPosted: March 27th, 2009, 10:12 pm 
Offline
Ancient Dragon
User avatar

Joined: March 11th, 2009, 7:06 pm
Posts: 425
Location: Somewhere. Plotting
It is going very good keep up the good wrok. I am gonna keep my eyes on this one.

_________________
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Lifestyle of a Teenage Superhero(Part 4)
PostPosted: March 29th, 2009, 4:47 pm 
Offline
Whelp
User avatar

Joined: March 12th, 2009, 5:34 pm
Posts: 47
Nice...
I'm liking the almost casual way he addresses his change in life.
But, taste would not work without smell. Sorry i have to bring that up but it actually provoked me to reply. :embarrassed:


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Lifestyle of a Teenage Superhero(Part 4)
PostPosted: March 29th, 2009, 4:58 pm 
Offline
Paladin of the Night
User avatar

Joined: March 13th, 2009, 12:15 pm
Posts: 562
Location: Umm.... Where am I? How'd I get here?
It-Is-I wrote:
But, taste would not work without smell. Sorry i have to bring that up but it actually provoked me to reply. :embarrassed:

Really? Why is that? :confused:

_________________
ZebrA CloaK.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Lifestyle of a Teenage Superhero(Part 4)
PostPosted: March 29th, 2009, 6:07 pm 
Offline
The Sunny Stormcloud
User avatar

Joined: March 12th, 2009, 9:13 pm
Posts: 294
very interesting so far ^_^

_________________
Insanity is your perception of my reality... >:3


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Lifestyle of a Teenage Superhero(Part 4)
PostPosted: March 29th, 2009, 7:19 pm 
Offline
Ancient Dragon
User avatar

Joined: March 11th, 2009, 7:06 pm
Posts: 425
Location: Somewhere. Plotting
Not true. Taste does work without smell. It is just that smell influences what you expect the item to taste like. If something smells bad but tastes good . Before tasting it your mind will tell you this probably tastes bad because it smells bad. Other than that the taste buds determine what you really taste. :amused: :weird:

_________________
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Lifestyle of a Teenage Superhero(Part 5)
PostPosted: March 31st, 2009, 4:25 pm 
Offline
Whelp
User avatar

Joined: March 12th, 2009, 5:34 pm
Posts: 47
Bwaha...
I return to argue my corner on taste. :eager:
The taste buds can only recieve five different tastes (sweet, sour, salty, bitter and umami) any other taste variation is added by the olfactorys (smelling things) or the brain.
For instance both apple and raw potato taste the same if you hold your nose.

Taste would work but it would be a bit bland! Flavour includes taste, touch and smell.


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 64 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ... 7  Next

All times are UTC - 5 hours


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 0 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group